Confusion, weirdness, and coincidence

Wow! I've left everyone hanging in suspense for a whole week! Has your life been disrupted by frequent trips to the computer to see if I've posted recently? ....No?.....OK.

My tiling skills took a beating this week when I discovered how difficult it is to tile around obstructions; in this case, a sink. According to the guy who wrote my home improvement book, you need a glass cutter and a pair of tile nippers. According to the guys at Home Depot, you need something called a wet saw and protective eyewear. That's quite a stark contrast. I feel like a gymnast from one of those former Soviet-bloc nations that has to follow the little 12-year-old Chinese gymnast (who they swear is 16) who just got through mesmerizing the crowd with her never-before-attempted feats of skill. In other words, I thought I knew what I was doing but was left feeling a bit deflated before the big show. (In this analogy, I don't have a leotard wedgie, though.)

Anyway, with the use of different-sized tiles and creative placement, I was able to avoid using cutting implements in a manner to which I was not accustomed -- that is, trimming 90-degree angles. I would like to take this opportunity to thank my mother (as if this were akin to an Academy Award) for not giving up on me. She provided moral support and shared her superior bank of knowledge acquired from being a loyal viewer of HGTV (I believe she falls into their main demographic audience, in fact.) Also, thank you to Neal for giving his stamp of approval on the finished product. My level of job satisfaction is rather high.

Switching gears to other news, something really weird happened this week. I was sitting at my desk when a man walked into our office and approached me. He asked me if I wanted to see something as he reached into his pocket. Needless to say, my mind started to scramble wildly. No....please! No! No!

Initially, relief swept over me when he pulled out a wad of napkins. Then, as he unfolded the layers of said napkin, terror set in once again. What could it contain? A severed finger? A freakish bug autopsy? I sat speechless as I mentally hatched an escape plan in case it was anthrax.

Alas, it was a few strips of beef brisket. He presented it to me and explained that he had bought it "up the street" and offered me a sample. At first, I thought it had to be a joke. Who would partake of pocket brisket from a total stranger? If the meat had been in different surroundings, such as a plate from which brisket is normally served, it would have been difficult to turn down as it appeared to have been delicious at some point. The point right before it went into his pocket in a mound of napkins, to be exact. On the upside, he found a way to keep it warm, I suppose. I declined his invitation and he wrapped the meat back into its napkin surroundings and returned it to his pocket, completely undaunted by the look of horror on my face. If they ever hire this guy to give out samples at Costco, they might want to explain to him that the food looks much more appetizing when it is distributed in those little sample cups as opposed to his pants.

Although that story can be filed under the "yuk" weird category, other things have happened to me that go into the "wow" weird category. One example is how some friends in Houston offered us Astros tickets out of the blue one day years ago. They couldn't go at the last minute and the seats were crazy-good, so we totally pounced on the chance to go. We went and had a great time and our kids were even featured on the Jumbotron screen.

As we were leaving the game, my cell phone rang. I picked it up and it was my sister. She says "Where are you?" and I told her we were leaving the Astros game. She says "Me too" and I thought I didn't hear her correctly until she explained that she and a friend went to the game at the last minute just completely on a whim. She then went on to say that she was sitting there enjoying the game when she sees my daughter on the screen and exclaimed to the people in her section "That's my niece!"...then as they panned over to my son, she screamed "And that's my nephew!" She tried to call me right then but I couldn't hear my cell phone over the game and crowd noise. Wow....what are the odds? Both of us were at Minute Maid Park for the first time ever...both were last-minute decisions...and she sees my kids on the Jumbotron. (Twilight Zone music here). Just goes to show, if you cheat on your spouse, don't take your date to an Astros game.